My partner Patrick and I are creating a group program for individuals and partners who are in the beginning stages of ethical non-monogamy and want to start on the right foot. Find out when registration opens!

My partner Patrick and I are creating a program for individuals and partners who are in the beginning stages of ethical non-monogamy and want to start on the right foot. Find out when registration opens!

Are you moving towards ethical non-monogamy, but you or your partner have hesitations or fears about it?

Relationships are not one-size-fits-all. Designing your relationship(s) around your unique needs and desires could look SO many different ways. That's why this is so much bigger than "non-monogamy," "open relationships" or "polyamory". This is Relationship Design. 

We offer step-by-step guidance for creating a relationship that authentically works for you and whoever you're with, beyond labels or social convention.

Even if you and your partner seem to want different things when it comes to opening up, we will help you bridge the gap.

...but you and your partner have different comfort levels with the idea of an open relationship or conflicting ideas about what it would look like. Perhaps you also have trust or communication issues you need healed first. We'll help you explore all the options available to you and design your relationship agreements in the most supportive way possible—by empowering you to deeply connect with each other first, then exploring baby steps together.

If you have already experimented with opening your relationship and it was difficult or painful (perhaps involving a breach of trust) and now you're left with confusion, pain and/or differing desires for how to move forward, this program will walk you step-by-step through how to try again in a healthier way. In this program, learn how to rebuild trust, gain clarity on your relationship agreements, and feel more intimately connected to your partner.

"Janel helped us through the process of opening our 22-year marriage. Her amazing communication techniques gave us the wisdom, confidence & empathy we needed to transcend many years of outdated belief structures. We have been deeply moved by our ability to grow together and better honor each other’s needs and desires."

- Chris & Lina H.

If you and your partner have different desires around opening up, we're not going to push one of you to change nor shame one of you for being too "needy," too vanilla, too kinky, too desiring, etc. Both of your needs are valid. We will help you find win-win solutions and design a relationship that works for both of you.

In our longterm non-monogamous partnership, Patrick and I have been on both sides of the story. Sometimes, one of us wants more freedom than the other person does, and it brings up insecurity and jealousy. We both intimately understand the struggles that can come along with opening up your relationship.

This program creates a structured, ritualistic space in which you will both feel seen for what you want and accepted for where you're at. 

70 powerful lessons and transformative practices:

30-Day Milestone: Create a foundation of secure attachment for a healthy "more open" relationship.

60-Day Milestone: Commit to your "positive boundaries" to continue to add value to your relationship over the longterm.

90-Day Milestone: Co-create and start to live by new relationship agreements that empower you both to thrive.

Janel is a certified sex & relationship coach and anti-shame advocate. Her passion is helping partners transform fear, jealousy and insecurity into deeper connection and more authentic, fulfilling sex lives.

She became a coach because of her own personal journey of overcoming shame about her non-monogamous relationship orientation and bisexuality.

After 14 years of Catholic school, she knew she needed to go on a journey of self-discovery in order to love herself. So, she traveled the world as a cruise ship singer, lived on communes, experimented with polyamory, hiked 5,000 miles across the US and took 400 hours of coaching trainings. Along the way, she learned how to face her fears, embrace what she really wants in life and love, and talk about her needs without shame.

Now, Janel is here to help you create a more open, authentic relationship that truly fits you.

Challenged with painful relationships and mental health struggles in his early twenties, Patrick has studied interpersonal dynamics, compassionate communication, and human behavior for more than a fifteen years. He's passionate about helping others develop more intimate relationships, supporting people to love themselves more deeply, and educating about interpersonal and systemic power dynamics.

Patrick has worked in the private and nonprofit sector, including a period working for the Burning Man organization, taking high schoolers on weeklong wilderness backpacking excursions, and running an independent nonprofit consulting business. He has a BS and MBA from UC Berkeley and is a CTI certified coach. He has done hundreds of hours of communication and facilitation trainings, including classes on nonviolent communication, antiracism and anti-oppression, and group counseling.

We'll contact you with more program details soon, and you'll be the first to know when registration opens. 😊

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